Showing posts with label Child Abuse Month. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Child Abuse Month. Show all posts
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Abuse Stories
Last night I was kinda in a sad mood. When I'm sad I watch True Hollywood Story Investigates. Abuse was all over them last night. A 14 year old got preggers by a 20 year old. He decided to start kicking her in the belly so the baby wouldn't happen. A military man was molesting a 17 year old girl. He would slap her if she didn't go with it. I for one am now shaken.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Interview with Judy
Have you experienced abuse or seen a friend abused?
Well, there are many kinds of abuse and I think that when people think of abuse, they're thinking about physical abuse or assault. I did not experience that as a child but I watched my best friend go through it for years- first with her father and then with her boyfriends. On the other hand, I was the victim of emotional and verbal abuse as a child, and also neglect, which I believe is a form of abuse. I don't think that one kind is worse than the other. All forms of abuse intimidate, shame, and damage children (or adults) and overcoming that takes a tremendous amount of work. Or a lifetime.
Should penalties be higher for the abusers?
I honestly don't know what the penalties are from state to state, so I can't say. I work with an advocacy group for victims of violent crimes and I know that without help, trauma can fill a life for a very long time. I don't think courts should be lenient with people who damage others, especially children.
Why do so many people get away with it?
For the most part, women are afraid to tell on their abusers because they fear reprisal. What if you lived with a man who abused you and held your life in his hands? What if he held the purse strings too? How could you break away from that and turn this person in? Many abused people are very beat down and not able to get out or report their abusers. Sometimes if they do, they are stalked and killed.
Bad Girls Club portrays such strong graphics. What did you want to get across?
I wanted people to get into the head of a parentified and abused child and take the ride with her. My greatest desire was for readers to truly feel and experience the life that my main character had and to fully sympathize with her. I believe I was successful at doing that. But there are no graphic scenes of abuse in my book. Anything that happens, other than some verbal sword fights, happen off stage and for good reason. My book wasn't about victimizing the victim, which is a form of literature I have no interest in. My book was about how this teen found a way to survive, how she subsequently lost her soul and her identity and then had to pick herself up and find a way to find her life. I don't know that you can understand what that is like unless you have been there and I wanted to take the reader into Destiny's head for a while and let them get on that roller coaster with her so that they'd understand why she couldn't turn in her mother and father and why she had to protect her father. Children like this are very loyal and very protective of their parents. A child's attachment to an abusing parent is very crooked but it's very strong. It's easy for people to say, "Oh, you should do something about this," but until you've been in those shoes, you don't know what you will or won't be able to do. I also wanted to show the people around a teenager like this--the friend who is loyal (to a detriment), the people on the outside who watch and do nothing. And family members who live in denial. I've had many people--reviewers, teachers, librarians, and mental health experts--compare my book to A Child Called It, but they all say that it truly explains the generational cycle of abuse in a way that the light goes on and you can say, "Ah, hah! I get it now." And that is what I set out to do.
I think child abuse is one of the worst crimes ever. Do you agree or disagree?Hurting a little child who cannot defend herself is an awful crime. I do believe it's one of the worst crimes ever. But abusers pick on small people because they can get away with it. Maybe that's why they're in real danger once they get inside a prison because it's considered a very vile crime.
With the abuse we already give ourselves (the fight to be thin, to be perfect, the cutting, drinking etc.) we dont need adults adding. What would you say to that?
I think they're very different things but I agree that we don't need anyone adding problems to our lives. I can't tell you the years I spent getting over the shame I felt about who I was and what I saw in my own home as a child. I could tell you stories that would make your blood curdle, even though I was never physically hit. But I was so beat into the ground by what went on there, for which my parents were responsible, and the wounds were not visible. That is one point I made in my book. Destiny had no visible wounds. Does that mean she's not damaged or dying inside?
Any last thoughts?
It's great that we have a month to talk about these issues. I wish I could stand in front of crowds of teenagers and talk to them about these things. Kids need to understand how their words and actions can hurt someone and there's a whole group of kids out there who are hurting and need help and they don't know who to reach out to. I'd like to help them find resources so they can heal.
Thanks so much Judy! Check out her book Bad Girls Club for more info on child abuse. If you or someone you know are being abused contact your local law enforcement.
Well, there are many kinds of abuse and I think that when people think of abuse, they're thinking about physical abuse or assault. I did not experience that as a child but I watched my best friend go through it for years- first with her father and then with her boyfriends. On the other hand, I was the victim of emotional and verbal abuse as a child, and also neglect, which I believe is a form of abuse. I don't think that one kind is worse than the other. All forms of abuse intimidate, shame, and damage children (or adults) and overcoming that takes a tremendous amount of work. Or a lifetime.
Should penalties be higher for the abusers?
I honestly don't know what the penalties are from state to state, so I can't say. I work with an advocacy group for victims of violent crimes and I know that without help, trauma can fill a life for a very long time. I don't think courts should be lenient with people who damage others, especially children.
Why do so many people get away with it?
For the most part, women are afraid to tell on their abusers because they fear reprisal. What if you lived with a man who abused you and held your life in his hands? What if he held the purse strings too? How could you break away from that and turn this person in? Many abused people are very beat down and not able to get out or report their abusers. Sometimes if they do, they are stalked and killed.
Bad Girls Club portrays such strong graphics. What did you want to get across?
I wanted people to get into the head of a parentified and abused child and take the ride with her. My greatest desire was for readers to truly feel and experience the life that my main character had and to fully sympathize with her. I believe I was successful at doing that. But there are no graphic scenes of abuse in my book. Anything that happens, other than some verbal sword fights, happen off stage and for good reason. My book wasn't about victimizing the victim, which is a form of literature I have no interest in. My book was about how this teen found a way to survive, how she subsequently lost her soul and her identity and then had to pick herself up and find a way to find her life. I don't know that you can understand what that is like unless you have been there and I wanted to take the reader into Destiny's head for a while and let them get on that roller coaster with her so that they'd understand why she couldn't turn in her mother and father and why she had to protect her father. Children like this are very loyal and very protective of their parents. A child's attachment to an abusing parent is very crooked but it's very strong. It's easy for people to say, "Oh, you should do something about this," but until you've been in those shoes, you don't know what you will or won't be able to do. I also wanted to show the people around a teenager like this--the friend who is loyal (to a detriment), the people on the outside who watch and do nothing. And family members who live in denial. I've had many people--reviewers, teachers, librarians, and mental health experts--compare my book to A Child Called It, but they all say that it truly explains the generational cycle of abuse in a way that the light goes on and you can say, "Ah, hah! I get it now." And that is what I set out to do.
I think child abuse is one of the worst crimes ever. Do you agree or disagree?Hurting a little child who cannot defend herself is an awful crime. I do believe it's one of the worst crimes ever. But abusers pick on small people because they can get away with it. Maybe that's why they're in real danger once they get inside a prison because it's considered a very vile crime.
With the abuse we already give ourselves (the fight to be thin, to be perfect, the cutting, drinking etc.) we dont need adults adding. What would you say to that?
I think they're very different things but I agree that we don't need anyone adding problems to our lives. I can't tell you the years I spent getting over the shame I felt about who I was and what I saw in my own home as a child. I could tell you stories that would make your blood curdle, even though I was never physically hit. But I was so beat into the ground by what went on there, for which my parents were responsible, and the wounds were not visible. That is one point I made in my book. Destiny had no visible wounds. Does that mean she's not damaged or dying inside?
Any last thoughts?
It's great that we have a month to talk about these issues. I wish I could stand in front of crowds of teenagers and talk to them about these things. Kids need to understand how their words and actions can hurt someone and there's a whole group of kids out there who are hurting and need help and they don't know who to reach out to. I'd like to help them find resources so they can heal.
Thanks so much Judy! Check out her book Bad Girls Club for more info on child abuse. If you or someone you know are being abused contact your local law enforcement.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Interview time
Blog link: http://booksforteensreviews.blogspot.com/
If you babysit for a child and can tell they are abused what would you do?
From past experiences, I have found out that the only way that you can get any professional help if a child is being abused, whether they are being abused physically, or verbally is if you have hands on truth. If I was babysitting a child in an abusive situation that was being verbally mistreated, the child would need to tell me what was going on, and preferably, I should have it recorded as evidence, for it to the case to even be seriously looked at. If the child told and showed me an injury that was in result of being abused, I would have to see it and then report it instead of her friend telling me, and then me reporting it. If I was babysitting a child that was being abused I would try to get as much proof as I could so that the case could be taken seriously and be considered.
Best Child abuse/ rape book?
I haven't read to many child abuse/rape books, however, "Touch" by Francine Prose (coming out in June!!) is about a teenage girl who is touched inappropriately in the back seat of a school bus by her jealous 'supposedly' best friends. I haven't read it yet, but "Living Dead Girl" sounds like it will be an amazing book, and is also on this subject.
Best abuse/ rape songs?
"Cold as You" by Taylor Swift
Why do you think child abuse is soo high right now?
I think that part of the reason child abuse is so high right now is partly because of the economy. It is sad, but I think that more people are getting depressed, mad, sad, and well, meaner because of it, making them more inclined to do this. I also think that people are starting to get lazier and not be as careful, resulting in doing the wrong things without even thinking things through first. I wish that people would think about what they are doing, and what they would think if someone was doing it to them.
Any other thoughts?
Verbal abuse can be as bad as physical abuse. Verbal abuse may not affect children physically, however, it affects and changes the way they think for the rest of their lives unless it is helped. When your own parents say that they don't like you, wish you weren't alive, and that they will "kill" you if you don't do something really affects the way you think, act, and are as a being. However, verbal abuse probably isn't as well taken care of because you cant prove it unless you have proof. There may not be any bruises on the outside, but in the inside they can be larger than life.
Thank you Ashley for letting me guest interview!! Also, thanks so much for using this month to get the word out about child abuse, I hope that the world can get a little brighter!
If you are a friend is being abused contact your local police or RAINN at 1-800-656-HOPE(4673).
If you babysit for a child and can tell they are abused what would you do?
From past experiences, I have found out that the only way that you can get any professional help if a child is being abused, whether they are being abused physically, or verbally is if you have hands on truth. If I was babysitting a child in an abusive situation that was being verbally mistreated, the child would need to tell me what was going on, and preferably, I should have it recorded as evidence, for it to the case to even be seriously looked at. If the child told and showed me an injury that was in result of being abused, I would have to see it and then report it instead of her friend telling me, and then me reporting it. If I was babysitting a child that was being abused I would try to get as much proof as I could so that the case could be taken seriously and be considered.
Best Child abuse/ rape book?
I haven't read to many child abuse/rape books, however, "Touch" by Francine Prose (coming out in June!!) is about a teenage girl who is touched inappropriately in the back seat of a school bus by her jealous 'supposedly' best friends. I haven't read it yet, but "Living Dead Girl" sounds like it will be an amazing book, and is also on this subject.
Best abuse/ rape songs?
"Cold as You" by Taylor Swift
Why do you think child abuse is soo high right now?
I think that part of the reason child abuse is so high right now is partly because of the economy. It is sad, but I think that more people are getting depressed, mad, sad, and well, meaner because of it, making them more inclined to do this. I also think that people are starting to get lazier and not be as careful, resulting in doing the wrong things without even thinking things through first. I wish that people would think about what they are doing, and what they would think if someone was doing it to them.
Any other thoughts?
Verbal abuse can be as bad as physical abuse. Verbal abuse may not affect children physically, however, it affects and changes the way they think for the rest of their lives unless it is helped. When your own parents say that they don't like you, wish you weren't alive, and that they will "kill" you if you don't do something really affects the way you think, act, and are as a being. However, verbal abuse probably isn't as well taken care of because you cant prove it unless you have proof. There may not be any bruises on the outside, but in the inside they can be larger than life.
Thank you Ashley for letting me guest interview!! Also, thanks so much for using this month to get the word out about child abuse, I hope that the world can get a little brighter!
If you are a friend is being abused contact your local police or RAINN at 1-800-656-HOPE(4673).
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Lexi is here to chat!
Lexi from anotherpageisused.blogspot.com is here for a visit! She has some important stuff to say about child abuse!
Tell us a personal story. Change names please :)
My friend, we'll call her Katie, had a dad who drank a lot. He drank from the minute he woke up until the minute he went to be. Katie never saw her dad sober. When he was drunk he would yell at her, throw things, hit things like the walls and sometimes even her. Her mom knew what was happening and she promised to make it stop but it never did. Katie ended up turning to drugs, alcohol, sex, and cutting. She was always high, always had a boyfriend. She didn't know how to make it stop so just found a way to make it disappear. I had no idea how to help her after she told me what was going on. I didn't know what to say, what to do. She didn't think that anything could ever make it better. I started doing research, I HAD to help her. I wouldn't let things continue the way they were. I made sure that she knew I was there. I made sure that she knew that my door was always open. I listened all of the time and offered my advice when I knew what to say. Katie told my everything after that. She's still dealing with her father, she's still dealing with the drink that both she and her father does, but I think that things are a little different now. Now she knows that without a doubt, I'm here for her. Along with her sister and now, even her mother.
Have you had a friend abused by a boyfriend?
I don't have any friends who have been abused by their BF. I can say that I am very glad about that because I would not put up with that. I would never let a stupid guy hurt someone that I love so much.
Have you or a friend experienced the trauma of rape?
I have personally never been raped, but I do know someone who was. It was very hard to get it out of her because we aren't very good friends, but I'm glad that she told me.
What would you tell a friend who was raped?
I would tell her that she needed to tell an adult that she TRUSTS right away. The trust factor in this is very important. Someone may not be able to tell their mom or an aunt or someone like that. They may have to tell a friend of the family, but that's still a very good option. It can be very hard to talk someone into telling, but it's the most important thing to do because you never know what could happen after someone gets raped.
Child abuse is so important to me. Is it to you?
I think that Child Abuse should be an important issue to everyone. More people go through it then people think. They're are so many different kinds, different forms. Form emotional abuse to physical abuse. I've suffered through emotional abuse, and I can say from experience that most of the time, the person who is saying things and hitting, doesn't really always get the effect of what they're doing.
Any last comments?
Child Abuse can be stopped. People need to know the signs for all of the different kinds, so that one day they can help someone because that's all the person wants, someone to help them, to be there, to care.
If you have been raped contact RAINN 1-800-656-HOPE(4673). Or your local police.
Tell us a personal story. Change names please :)
My friend, we'll call her Katie, had a dad who drank a lot. He drank from the minute he woke up until the minute he went to be. Katie never saw her dad sober. When he was drunk he would yell at her, throw things, hit things like the walls and sometimes even her. Her mom knew what was happening and she promised to make it stop but it never did. Katie ended up turning to drugs, alcohol, sex, and cutting. She was always high, always had a boyfriend. She didn't know how to make it stop so just found a way to make it disappear. I had no idea how to help her after she told me what was going on. I didn't know what to say, what to do. She didn't think that anything could ever make it better. I started doing research, I HAD to help her. I wouldn't let things continue the way they were. I made sure that she knew I was there. I made sure that she knew that my door was always open. I listened all of the time and offered my advice when I knew what to say. Katie told my everything after that. She's still dealing with her father, she's still dealing with the drink that both she and her father does, but I think that things are a little different now. Now she knows that without a doubt, I'm here for her. Along with her sister and now, even her mother.
Have you had a friend abused by a boyfriend?
I don't have any friends who have been abused by their BF. I can say that I am very glad about that because I would not put up with that. I would never let a stupid guy hurt someone that I love so much.
Have you or a friend experienced the trauma of rape?
I have personally never been raped, but I do know someone who was. It was very hard to get it out of her because we aren't very good friends, but I'm glad that she told me.
What would you tell a friend who was raped?
I would tell her that she needed to tell an adult that she TRUSTS right away. The trust factor in this is very important. Someone may not be able to tell their mom or an aunt or someone like that. They may have to tell a friend of the family, but that's still a very good option. It can be very hard to talk someone into telling, but it's the most important thing to do because you never know what could happen after someone gets raped.
Child abuse is so important to me. Is it to you?
I think that Child Abuse should be an important issue to everyone. More people go through it then people think. They're are so many different kinds, different forms. Form emotional abuse to physical abuse. I've suffered through emotional abuse, and I can say from experience that most of the time, the person who is saying things and hitting, doesn't really always get the effect of what they're doing.
Any last comments?
Child Abuse can be stopped. People need to know the signs for all of the different kinds, so that one day they can help someone because that's all the person wants, someone to help them, to be there, to care.
If you have been raped contact RAINN 1-800-656-HOPE(4673). Or your local police.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Pedophile/ Teacher-student relations
Pedophiles are all over. I met one once. He found me on a website when I was 13. He told me I was sexy. That he wanted to meet and F**k me. Very disturbing. Teachers also are having sexual relationships with students. If you get a creepy feeling around a teacher do something!
Urban dictionary: an adult who is sexually attracted to children.
I read a book called Treacherous Love. It was incredible. What this charming teacher did to a young student is crazy. You just want to punch him!
Urban dictionary: an adult who is sexually attracted to children.
I read a book called Treacherous Love. It was incredible. What this charming teacher did to a young student is crazy. You just want to punch him!
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Sexual Abuse (Rape)
Sexual Abuse is a really tough topic. Rape is more common than jus movies. I personally knew someone who had been raped at a party. Its scary and serious.
Dictionary.com: any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person.
Urban Dictionary: A crime. Quite terrible in nature. Often causes sever phycological damage to victim. Forced sexual intercourse. Often very violent in more then just a sexual way. And To force someone to ingage in unwanted sexual activities.
I have read many books about Sex abuse. Speak is one that really stands out. A girl becomes an outcast for calling the cops at a party after being raped by a popular guy.
Impulse is not only abuse but suicide as well. One boy's at the treatment facility for attempting to kill himself because he was raped. His mothers boyfriend raped him so he tried to beat the guy up. That only got him sent to jail.
Living Dead Girl also explores this. A girl was kidnapped as a young child and is forced to have sex with her kidnapper.
Dictionary.com: any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person.
Urban Dictionary: A crime. Quite terrible in nature. Often causes sever phycological damage to victim. Forced sexual intercourse. Often very violent in more then just a sexual way. And To force someone to ingage in unwanted sexual activities.
I have read many books about Sex abuse. Speak is one that really stands out. A girl becomes an outcast for calling the cops at a party after being raped by a popular guy.
Impulse is not only abuse but suicide as well. One boy's at the treatment facility for attempting to kill himself because he was raped. His mothers boyfriend raped him so he tried to beat the guy up. That only got him sent to jail.
Living Dead Girl also explores this. A girl was kidnapped as a young child and is forced to have sex with her kidnapper.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Interview
*changes to how to win
There will be no Weekly Mail Call today. Child Abuse Month is more important to me than telling you guys what books I got.
Today we have Beth Fehlbaum, author of Courage In Patience, a story of hope for those who have endured abuse. Available on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com
Her website is http://courageinpatience.blogspot.com/
Have you personally experienced child abuse?
Yes. I was sexually abused beginning at age 8, into my teens; I was emotionally abused and also experienced neglect.
When you see children who look scared of their parents what do you want to do?
I want to take the child aside and try to get him or her to talk to me. The thing is, many times, kids are the ones who most try to convince everyone else that things are fine at home.
Teens practically abuse themselves in some of the ways they act. Why do adults feel the need to add to it? Thoughts?
I see what you're saying-- some of the choices teens make are self-destructive. I'm not sure adults think about it in terms of trying to add to it. I think sometimes adults are clumsy in the way they approach teens who are in pain, or the pain they see their kids going through strikes them in a way that they are not prepared to handle, either because of their own "stuff" (history), or because they are unaware of how their actions contribute to the hurt the teen is experiencing-- or because they are so caught up in their own lives they simply do not consider how their lack of understanding is wounding their kids.
Where should a teen or child look for help?
In my book, Courage in Patience, the main character, Ashley, finds help when she is forced by her best friend Lisa to confide in a trusted teacher. If I had felt a connection to a teacher when I was growing up, I think I might have spoken up, too. I am a teacher as well as a writer-- and I try to develop trusting relationships with my students so that they know they can count on me to care about them as people, not "just" as people who take up space in my classroom.
Do you have any advice for a teen who is experiencing domestic violence?
As hard as it is to trust others when you are in an abusive situation, I really encourage you to reach out and talk to teachers or parents of your friends.
Do you think child abuse is one of the worst crimes?
Absolutely-- the thing is, it tends to be a vicious cycle and it is only in telling what is going on and getting help to break the cycle that it is stopped. It takes honesty, courage, a support system, and a skilled mental health professional to navigate the minefield of recovery.
any last thoughts?
Yes: there is hope. Never forget that there is hope, and you are NOT alone.
Contest alert! Beth is giving away a copy of Courage in Patience. This is not a random contest. One winner will be chosen, You must have completed all two tasks.
1. Write a paragraph about what you would do to help a friend OR a time time that you have had to face up to something that was hurting you in any way.
2. Subscribe to my blog
US and Canada only...
Lets get this out there guys!
There will be no Weekly Mail Call today. Child Abuse Month is more important to me than telling you guys what books I got.
Today we have Beth Fehlbaum, author of Courage In Patience, a story of hope for those who have endured abuse. Available on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com
Her website is http://courageinpatience.blogspot.com/
Have you personally experienced child abuse?
Yes. I was sexually abused beginning at age 8, into my teens; I was emotionally abused and also experienced neglect.
When you see children who look scared of their parents what do you want to do?
I want to take the child aside and try to get him or her to talk to me. The thing is, many times, kids are the ones who most try to convince everyone else that things are fine at home.
Teens practically abuse themselves in some of the ways they act. Why do adults feel the need to add to it? Thoughts?
I see what you're saying-- some of the choices teens make are self-destructive. I'm not sure adults think about it in terms of trying to add to it. I think sometimes adults are clumsy in the way they approach teens who are in pain, or the pain they see their kids going through strikes them in a way that they are not prepared to handle, either because of their own "stuff" (history), or because they are unaware of how their actions contribute to the hurt the teen is experiencing-- or because they are so caught up in their own lives they simply do not consider how their lack of understanding is wounding their kids.
Where should a teen or child look for help?
In my book, Courage in Patience, the main character, Ashley, finds help when she is forced by her best friend Lisa to confide in a trusted teacher. If I had felt a connection to a teacher when I was growing up, I think I might have spoken up, too. I am a teacher as well as a writer-- and I try to develop trusting relationships with my students so that they know they can count on me to care about them as people, not "just" as people who take up space in my classroom.
Do you have any advice for a teen who is experiencing domestic violence?
As hard as it is to trust others when you are in an abusive situation, I really encourage you to reach out and talk to teachers or parents of your friends.
Do you think child abuse is one of the worst crimes?
Absolutely-- the thing is, it tends to be a vicious cycle and it is only in telling what is going on and getting help to break the cycle that it is stopped. It takes honesty, courage, a support system, and a skilled mental health professional to navigate the minefield of recovery.
any last thoughts?
Yes: there is hope. Never forget that there is hope, and you are NOT alone.
Contest alert! Beth is giving away a copy of Courage in Patience. This is not a random contest. One winner will be chosen, You must have completed all two tasks.
1. Write a paragraph about what you would do to help a friend OR a time time that you have had to face up to something that was hurting you in any way.
2. Subscribe to my blog
US and Canada only...
Lets get this out there guys!
Friday, April 10, 2009
Interview:
*changes to how to win
Hey guys sorry there will be no fab Friday this week. Child Abuse month is on my heart so much at the moment that I just decided to blow it off. Instead we have an interview with the lovely Jennifer Banash.
Hey guys sorry there will be no fab Friday this week. Child Abuse month is on my heart so much at the moment that I just decided to blow it off. Instead we have an interview with the lovely Jennifer Banash.
Child Abuse effects a child in so many ways. What would you tell an adult who is still feeling traumatized?
I would tell them to find a good therapist and try to work through their issues of fear and anger surrounding the abuse. The most important thing is to break the cycle of physical violence and not engage in abusive behavior yourself.
Should penalties be higher for abusers?
I'm not sure how I feel about that question. I think that abuse is largely a cycle--abusers have generally been abused--whether that abuse be physical or emotional. What they need is help and treatment--not necessarily longer periods of incarceration. I believe in rehabilitation-not vindictive forms of punishment. But that's just my own personal opinion.
Should help be easier for the abused?
In an ideal world, yes. There is so much fear and shame surrounding an abused child, that often they are too scared and ashamed to tell anyone. This makes it all the more important to reach out if you suspect a problem.
Why do you think so many people keep quiet?
Fear of the situation worsening. Shame. Many children believe they are being abused because they've done something wrong, which is never the case. A child is never responsible for their own abuse.
Any personal stuff you have to tell us?
I grew up in a physically and emotionally abusive household until social services removed me from my home when I was 16. I ran away at 15 and lived on the streets for almost a year just to escape. My mother was a rageaholic, and took out her frustrations on the family, hitting myself, my little brother, and sometimes my stepfather. It was an unbearable way to live, and it really ruined my ability to trust other people--although I'm working on it. Healing is a process--it doesn't happen overnight.
I think this is one of the worst crimes possible. Do you agree?
Yes, because it actively affects and can derail a child's emotional development. Scars can heal, but the damage is irreversible.
Where would you tell teens to look for help?
If someone is abusing you at home, tell a teacher--that's what saved me. I went went to school with a black eye on day, and a teacher got involved.
Any extra advice on getting out?
There are organizations such as www.childhelp.com where you can report abuse and get help. Just Google "child abuse help" and a ton of info and websites will pop up. The most important thing to remember is that being hit is not NORMAL--it's not happening to everyone else--which is what I thought as a kid. You deserve to live without fear.
Any last thoughts?
Although I do come from an abusive background, I do not let that stigma define who I am. I think that kind of attitude can be dangerous. I don't use my abuse to make excuses for myself, and I don't feel sorry for myself either. It wasn't a blessing by any means, but it did make me the person I am today, and I really like that person! I don't think I will ever be able to forgive my parents, but I can't forget either. I look at my recovery from the abuse as a work in progress--there will always be healing to do--there are no quick fixes.
Along with an interview Jennifer is giving away two books. The Elite and In Too Deep. This contest is not a random contest. To win this contest you have two requirements.
1. You must write a paragraph about what the abuser is thinking, feeling and saying well they are hurting the people they should love.
2. You must follow/ subscribe to Jennifer's blog: http://jenniferbanash.wordpress.com/ or my blog. You dont have to do both.
Two winners will be picked, one for each book. Lets get this out there guys. I cant bare to hear of another child being beaten for the most minuscule thing.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Mental Abuse
Mental Abuse can take place in many forms.
Dictionary.com says its: to speak insultingly, harshly, and unjustly to or harshly or coarsely insulting language.
Urban Dictionary (who I dont usually trust) says: The act of or the effects of mentally scaring a person. The effects are often long term.
Bad Girls Club had mental abuse in it. The mother basically degraded her youngest daughter all the time. The youngster was left wondering what she did wrong.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Physical Abuse
What is Physical abuse?
Dictionary.com defines it as: to treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way.
I have read several books about physical abuse before I started this. They will not be getting reviews, probably because I already have reviewed them.
A Child Called It is a memoir. I read it in 7th grade and cried nonstop. It was so sad how a parent could treat a child that way. I just wanted to slap the mom silly.
Bad Girls Club has some physical abuse in it. It was not the usual slap or kick or beat stuff. The mom was crazy and would do these insane things to her child. Like leave her to fall into Crater Lake or paint her face.
These books are must reads.
Dictionary.com defines it as: to treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way.
I have read several books about physical abuse before I started this. They will not be getting reviews, probably because I already have reviewed them.
A Child Called It is a memoir. I read it in 7th grade and cried nonstop. It was so sad how a parent could treat a child that way. I just wanted to slap the mom silly.
Bad Girls Club has some physical abuse in it. It was not the usual slap or kick or beat stuff. The mom was crazy and would do these insane things to her child. Like leave her to fall into Crater Lake or paint her face.
These books are must reads.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Child Abuse
Hey everyone it's child abuse month. This will include rape, mental abuse, physical abuse and pedophilia. I will still keep normal features going but there will be many things about child abuse all month. This is a hard topic but also important. Here are some things to expect:
~Chats about abuse
~A Child Called It
~Bad Girls Club
~Speak
~Impulse
~Treacherous Love
etc.
Thanks guys. Thoughts? Comments?
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