Sunday, May 17, 2009


Daria Snadowsky agreed to anwer the tough questions we all have. Lexi and I interviewed her... This is what she has to say.

With a teen sex as a large aspect in the media can you see why people are quick to blame the media?
The media is certainly a convenient scapegoat, and the constant bombardment of suggestive images in the media probably does make teen sex more permissive. However, the media also reflects society as it is and what it wants to see, so heaping all responsibility on the media may be unfair.

Do you think it’s important for teens to know their options regardless of wither their parents want them to?
Generally, I think too much information is less dangerous than not enough information. So yes, even if parents are urging their children to choose abstinence, I don’t believe that also educating them about protection would be counterproductive.

What influence do you want to give through your writing when it comes to teen sexuality?
With Anatomy of a Boyfriend, I don’t want to influence readers at all about teen sexuality. I just want to show them what the experience is like, for better or for worse. In the end, my book makes no judgment about whether teen sex is right or wrong. That’s for the individual readers to decide for themselves, based on the story and their own beliefs.

Do you think teen sex is a negative thing in all circumstances?
I’d prefer not to think of teen sex as inherently positive or negative. Kids aren’t automatically “good” for abstaining, and kids are certainly not automatically “bad” for acting on their sexual curiosity or romantic feelings. However, teen sex is often a very “bad idea” because of the physical and emotional risks involved.

Do you think teens don’t see the risk in foreplay like they do pure “sex”?
That may be true. Back when I took Health in the early nineties, the emphasis of sex education was how intercourse could transmit HIV, Herpes and HPV. We never learned how all those diseases can still be transmitted through other sexual means as well. Furthermore, we learned about only the physical risks of sex, never the emotional, which are just as important and can be just as permanent.

What would you tell your 15 year old sister who said she might have sex with her boyfriend?
Ideally, I wouldn’t say anything at first. I’d ask why she wanted to go all the way, and I’d listen closely as she explained. At that point, I’d reassure her that her reasons are understandable and normal and even well-meaning, but then I’d present counterpoints stressing all the less-than-romantic consequences that may and often do happen to sexually active teens, especially if the relationship ends in heartbreak. Furthermore, I’d urge her to think this out carefully because fifteen is very young to make such a big decision. Finally, if she does go through with it, I’d want her to know that she doesn’t have to keep going through with it. Although there may seem to be an unbridgeable divide between “virgin” and “non-virgin,” losing your virginity does not mean that you can’t go back to choosing abstinence.

Any last thoughts?
Kids today are lucky that so much helpful information about teen sexuality is available on the internet, whereas in my day we’d have to sneak around outdated library books and rely on (mis)information from our friends. If teens are hungry for information about their sexuality, they should take advantage of websites such as

Thanks for all the great words of wisdom! Daria is giving one lucky person a copy of anatomy of a boyfriend. Want it? Here's what you have to do:

+1 Comment here. Leave an email
+1 follow
+2 already follow
+2 2 sentences about ahat you would tell a sibling who wants to become sexually active?
+1 If you tell me if you think Sex ed should be required
More points avaliable if you enter at Lexi's blog:


Anonymous said...

Enter me.
I think a sibling should be told to wait. Guys are, more often then not, just after that. They need to be sure they're ready. And I do think Sex Ed. should be required because not all teens know the risks and just think it's something that will show the other that they love them. Like Ms. Snadowsky said it's better to know too much then to little.

PaulasPleasures said...

There is nothing wrong with giving teens lots of resources so that they can make an educated decision about having sex, as opposed to a decision based on what their friends talk and giggle about at school. I'm going to buy a copy of "Anatomy of a Boyfriend" and read it ASAP. It sounds intriguing.

Liyana said...

Ahh a contest! :D Great interview, as usual. :D I'm a follower.

2 sentences to my sister?
1: You're only 13; I'm telling mum!
2: Think carefully, there's no turning back.
Sex Ed is DEFINITELT required. No matter how lame or boring it is, it'll be useful sometime later when you're old.

Laina said...

If this is open to Canada...

+2 I already follow.
+2 I'm an only child, first of all. Second, I'm not sure what I'd tell them, it'd depend on what would make them listen the best.
+1 Yes, definitely. It's stupid not to have it required.

Vera said...

Please enter me -

+1 I'm a new follower

+2 I feel that many young people become sexually active due to peer pressure. I would tell a sibling that it's important to feel ready for yourself, to be completely OK with that choice, and not listen to your friends, classmates, etc. I would tell him/her that years from then they won't care about being popular or fitting in, but the choice to become sexually active or not will stay with them forever.

+1 I do think sex ed should be required. Education is the best weapon against teenage pregnancy, STDs, etc.

Silvia said...

I'd love to be entered. silvia_pi(at)
-I'm already a follower.
-I'd tell him to be really sure before doing someting, that it isn't a game.
- Sex ed should be required because it is necessary in the society we live today. See all this girls that are appearing on tv these day because they are pregnant with 14,15 years.

I'll post a link in my sidebar

robin_titan said...

Wow, interesting. :)

Yes I think sex ed should be required. Nowadays kids are getting crazier and crazier if you know what I mean. Sigh, it's freaking insane.
This reminds me of a recent Bones episode(that 26 or w/e year old girl from HSM comes out on it it's silly because it's obvious she's not really pregnant) about these pregnant teenagers who actually had sex ed in their school. So yeah...

lc_intocable [a]yahoo[d]com

Alexa said...

Enter me please!

I am a follower.

I would tell my sibling that they have to be ready emotional and mentally. Also that they should know how big of a deal it is.

I think Sex Ed. should be required. It's important for us to know all of the facts before hand.

robin_titan said...

duh sex ed should be mandatory! It's not like people are born knowing this stuff

tink122595 at hotmail dot com

Anonymous said...

This is a book I'd love to read. Please enter my name in your draw. Thanks.

Llehn said...

Please include me in this giveaway.

2 sentences: OMG! What are you thinking?!

Yes, Sex Ed should be required.